Jealousy is an emotion that refers to the negative thoughts of anxiety, envy and insecurity. In a relationship, it poisons the mind with thinking that your lover is having an affair. You are anticipating of losing someone you love to another person. You always think that everyone your partner meets every day is better than you. This is an immature behavior and will ruin a relationship. You sometimes lose confidence on trusting your partner. You are always keeping an eye on everywhere she goes and anyone she meets. When the time comes that she had enough of your suspicions against her, it leads to unnecessary arguments which can result in a break up.
If you cannot manage your jealousy, you will never have a healthy relationship. You will forever be alone. You are always bothered about thinking someone is better than you. It is time to change this attitude to have and enjoy a mature relationship. Here are some helpful tips to manage your jealousy:
Trust is important in a relationship. It keeps a relationship argument-free. It is the foundation in a relationship. Sometimes it is important than love because when you are apart, it measures how strong your relationship is.
Sometimes, you’re tempted to feel like your past experiences will happen again in your current relationship, especially when the reason for the break up was because of a third person. For instance, when both of you had a conversation about it, you somehow suddenly remember how painful it was to be betrayed by the one you loved most. You are traumatized by the experience. As a result, you feel like you can never trust another person again. It’s not your fault for feeling this way but it is not right either to not do your best to trust again. You must give someone a chance to earn your trust.
Being true to each other is the key to having a long term relationship. If you trust her, she will definitely trust you too.
Do not let jealousy take the best of you. You must learn to control yourself. If she is away from you, turn off the negative thoughts; meaning stop thinking suspicious thoughts such as her having an affair. Instead, think of something else that can take your mind out of the negative thought. Just imagining her with somebody will do you no good. It will only make you initiate a fight over something that is not really happening. Furthermore, it will only lower the bar of maturity in your relationship.
Stop restricting her from doing what she wants to do. This will only make her feel imprisoned because of your being over-possessive. If you are jealous because you think she might meet someone, stop it! Just relax and give her the space she needs. Just remind her to not forget her limitations when it comes to having fun out. Being over-possessive is actually not a bad attitude, but you also need to know when you are crossing the line between understanding her needs and you are suffocating her. Just think about putting yourself in her shoe, do you want someone making you feel like a slave, of course not! Let her choose the friends she wants to hang out with. That is not your choice to make. If she makes a mistake, she will surely learn from it.
Low self-esteem is the common root of jealousy. You might ask yourself this, “Why was I chosen by her?” Also, low self-esteem will make you think that someone will be better looking, smarter, richer, and funnier for her. Keep in mind that some of these characteristics are not what she is looking for in a guy. She chose you for a reason and that reason is already enough. There is no need for her to explain why. Do not make things hard for her. She loves you and that’s what matters most.
Jealousy focuses on your own emotions. You are just being selfish because you only want to attend to your needs. Not knowing that you are hurting her feelings for not trusting her. Sometimes you cannot stand the thought of her flirting around with other guys, you play around with this thought eve if a part of you knows it’s not her character. Do not let your emotions take over you. You should not allow jealousy to become your own weakness, instead, make it your strength in improving yourself.