You’ve heard what they say about online dating services: numerous choices, no commitment until you’re ready, meeting them all at once, cheap dollars, and yes, the potentials for a great lay!
Almost everyone you know in the office, gym or even your sports buddies are into online dating services. And with so many advantages over an impromptu face-to-face meeting-at-the-bar that ends up in failure majority of the time, what’s not to try with this dating service? As they say, “nothing to lose and everything to gain.” Well, yes, that’s true . . . Up until you’ve met someone in these online dating services that you literally want to dump but just don’t know how. Of course, it’s understandable that you are taking advantage of the process of elimination – weeding out women that you don’t like from those you do. With how women are these days, full of drama and all, you wish you could just simply “get out”. Here are a few suggestions:
Break away gently
Well, contrary to what you might be thinking about women – that they can’t handle “goodbyes” very well – they are stronger than you think. Women are actually “open-minded” and find some men highly predictable. Meaning, they see a “goodbye” coming from a mile away. So don’t pressure yourself too much on how to break free.
Surely you don’t want to appear as the man that was once too eager to interact with her, then so suddenly want to drop her like a hot potato. That isn’t being a “gentleman” by any language. You want to be careful on how to “dump” her; after all, if you’re still going to be exploring the online dating sites, you don’t want any bad words spreading around against you. At best, you want to maintain a status quo. I’d recommend still interacting with her online but with less and less frequency. Say in passing, in one of your conversations, that you’re going to be very busy in the coming days. Make up a story about you are travelling out of town for a midterm work that it would be impossible for you to still get in touch. If possible, mention the time you’re technically “disappearing” so she could expect this time to come. And when it’s time to ignore her communication efforts, she’ll understand and move forward.
Start treating her like a friend or a sister (no mention of romance)
If you are starting to realize that this woman you’re interacting with online is not someone you’d like to pursue, then by all means stop leading her on, but instead shift to a new mode of conversation, non-romantic, that is! Talk to her in a very casual manner as you would talk to a friend or sister. Avoid any conversation that would give any romantic impression. Simply don’t give her any reason to think you are into her. Instead, pretend you are seeing another woman at work and ask her for dating advice. You’ll soon find out that she’ll take the initiative to step back if this flow of conversation no longer appeals to her. If this happens, then congratulations, you’re off the hook!
Be honest (just say why it wouldn’t work out)
Nothing beats a better exit than honesty. Of course, just because you are encouraged to be honest doesn’t mean you can be blunt without any emotional considerations. You no longer want to have anything to do with this woman yet you want to maintain your image as a gentleman. Being honest does it!
Some women would be willing to move forward faster than you can say “go”, but leave her with her dignity still intact, at the very least. Most likely she’ll sense it that you are now becoming less and less interested in “staying engaged”. Don’t volunteer any of your thoughts just yet until the time is right; but don’t hesitate to give a straight (but gentle) and honest answer either, when asked. If she asked a specific question, for instance, of how you currently feel about her, or where you see your engagement heading; take the opportunity to tell her the truth. You’ll be surprised at how well she’d take this and how more impressed she is likely to feel about you.
Sure, you have the right to just dump anybody that bores you, intellectually, physically and sexually. But surely too, you don’t want to be remembered as someone short of an emotional manipulator – unless of course that’s what you really are.